{"id":2618,"date":"2025-05-20T10:01:57","date_gmt":"2025-05-20T14:01:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/where-fashion-meets-peak-performance\/"},"modified":"2025-11-25T10:26:19","modified_gmt":"2025-11-25T15:26:19","slug":"digital-sleep-divorce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/blog\/digital-sleep-divorce\/","title":{"rendered":"TIME TO BREAK UP WITH YOUR PHONE"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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A Digital "Sleep Divorce"<\/h2>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t
May \u00b7 2025\r\n<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t
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In recent years, the concept of \u201csleep divorce\u201d has gained attention as more couples choose to sleep apart. As a sleep scientist specializing in couples\u2019 sleep patterns, I often find myself addressing this topic. However, I take issue with the term \u201csleep divorce,\u201d as it carries negative connotations associated with relationship breakdowns. It\u2019s time to reconsider the stigma surrounding this choice.<\/p>\n

But I do endorse using the word \u201cdivorce\u201d to describe the bedtime breakup of another kind of relationship, that between you and your phone. Coupled or single, sleeping together or apart, cell phones make bad bedpartners and should be banned from the boudoir.<\/p>\n

Couples may opt to sleep separately for various reasons. For instance, differing sleep schedules, snoring, or restless movements can disrupt sleep quality. Contrary to popular belief, sleeping apart doesn\u2019t necessarily signal a decline in relationship quality or intimacy. In fact, my two decades of research and clinical experience reveal that there is no universal sleeping strategy for all couples. So sleeping separately should hardly be described as a divorce.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/section>\n

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“Start by putting down your phone at least 15 minutes before lights out.\u201d<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n
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“Beyond sleep, couples should consider the relational impact of phone use before bed.\u201d<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n
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“Share the day\u2019s high and low points and offer each other a compliment.\u201d<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n
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“…check in with each other about how it feels and how you\u2019ve been sleeping”<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n
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It\u2019s crucial to eliminate the use of a term that needlessly stigmatizes nontraditional sleeping arrangements. Instead, let\u2019s focus on where a \u201csleep divorce\u201d is truly needed \u2014with our phones.\u00a0A recent study<\/a>\u00a0found that each additional hour of screen time increased insomnia risk by 59% and reduced sleep duration by 24 minutes. Even with blue light filters or glasses, the stimulating content of doomscrolling, emails, or videos can interfere with sleep.<\/p>\n

Beyond sleep, couples should consider the relational impact of phone use before bed. This time is precious for couples to connect and unwind. In our evolutionary past, darkness fostered closeness and social connection. Today, we\u2019ve replaced that sacred space with solitary scrolling.<\/p>\n

Divorcing from phones isn\u2019t easy, but it\u2019s possible. Start by putting down your phone at least 15 minutes before lights out. During this time, try the\u00a0\u201cHigh, Low, Compliment\u201d exercise<\/a>\u00a0with your partner. Share the day\u2019s high and low points and offer each other a compliment. This exercise fosters open communication without conflict and helps identify the little reasons you appreciate each other. If you are one of the increasing numbers of couples who choose not to share a bed with your partner, you can still come together to have this moment together, before you go your separate ways for the night.<\/p>\n

Do this phone-free exercise nightly for a week, and at week\u2019s end, check in with each other about how it feels and how you\u2019ve been sleeping. It\u2019s a great way to break up with your phone and reconnect with your partner.<\/p>\n

Of course, sleeping arrangements, including the use of digital devices, should be a couple-level decision. But it\u2019s worth considering a commitment to a digital \u201csleep divorce.\u201d Phones have no place in the bed. Embrace this change for better sleep and stronger relationships.<\/p>\n

Wendy Troxel is a senior behavioral and social scientist at RAND Corporation, an adjunct professor at the University of Pittsburgh and University of Utah, and author of Sharing the Covers: Every Couple\u2019s Guide to Better Sleep.<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/section>\n\n\n

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Dr. Wendy Troxel uncovers how divorcing your phone from the bedroom impacts sleep and relationships, plus tips to build a “new sleep alliance” with your partner for a stronger, las…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1605,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2618","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2618","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2618"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2618\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3154,"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2618\/revisions\/3154"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1605"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2618"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2618"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equinox-hotels.com\/nyc\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2618"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}